VAUGHAN, ON – Local accountant Shawn Kronbach recently revealed that he feels a sexy spine tingle every time he tells someone about shots that were in the film trailer but not in the film i…
Entertainment
James Cameron finishes filming Avatar 4 before realizing he never made Avatar 2 or 3
LOS ANGELES – James Cameron has announced he has finished filming Avatar 4 right after realizing he never made Avatar 2 or Avatar 3. “I cannot wait for everyone to see what I have in store …
Ontario movie theatres reopen just in time for sweaty hand job season
SCARBOROUGH – Ontario is rejoicing as the province moves into stage three, seeing the return of indoor dining, casinos, and perhaps the most anticipated, movie theatres making a triumphant …
Disney announces new Pocahontas movie exploring tragic, sympathetic backstory of white Christian imperialism
LOS ANGELES – Following the success of their hit movies MALEFICENT and CRUELLA, Disney have announced that it plans to continue the trend of movies that humanize and sympathize with famous …
Opinion: Do women deserve rights?
LOS ANGELES, CA – The newest saga of the Britney Spears conservatorship story presents a very difficult, complex question: Do women deserve rights? For years now, Spears’ legal conservator …
Channing Tatum revealed to have been trapped at bottom of well for past 4 years
LOS ANGELES – A list actor Channing Tatum’s recent multi-year absence from Hollywood films has been explained after the megastar was found trapped at the bottom of a well. “Good God, I’ve b…
Citytv orders Rex & Rex, both cops, both dogs
TORONTO – After the success of buddy-cop-dog drama Hudson & Rex, Citytv has reportedly greenlit the spin-off Rex & Rex, both cops, both dogs. “We’re thrilled!” began Mark Scotts, th…
Friends reunion mostly cast discussing how Frasier was better
LOS ANGELES, CA – The cast and crew of the highly anticipated Friends reunion special have admitted that the episode is primarily devoted to them talking about how Frasier was the vastly superior…
UN names “Star Trek: TNG episode where Dr. Crusher bones the ghost that boned her grandma” humanity’s greatest cultural achievement
NEW YORK CITY, NY – The General Assembly of the United Nations has passed a resolution acknowledging the 1994 Star Trek: The Next Generation episode “Sub Rosa” as the most important cultural achi…
Experts advise melting down your Golden Globes to make an Oscar
LOS ANGELES, CA – With Tom Cruise returning his Golden Globe awards over allegations of a lack of diversity and ethics at the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, PR professionals recommend…
