Trudeau airs a coronavirus update rerun, to see if anyone notices - The Beaverton
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Trudeau airs a coronavirus update rerun, to see if anyone notices

OTTAWA – After several weeks of daily broadcast addresses on the government’s response, Prime Minister Trudeau today decided to re-air a previous clip to see if Canadians would notice.

“It’s important to stay in constant communication with Canadians during this trying time,” said the weary Prime Minister, “But it’s also important to remember that this is a marathon and not a sprint. And while I’m still working hard, like a lot of my fellow Canadians, this is all really starting to catch up with me.”

“Besides, we picked a really good episode, and I genuinely don’t think the viewers at home will clock it.” The PM then cracked a beer and settled in to watch Netflix’s Tiger King, with aims to resume daily addresses tomorrow once he’s “re-charged”.

The video aired earlier today was in fact from the Prime Minister’s address on Thursday, March 19th. While that day’s news specifically covered the shutdown of the US-Canada border and expanded testing in BC, the Prime Minister maintained it was a good video to substitute due to it being “pretty generic”.

“We made sure to choose a pretty standard day’s address about public safety. You know – wash your hands, social distancing, we’re all in this together. It’s not like any of that stuff has changed in the past two weeks. It’s still good advice.” Trudeau also went on to cite the March 19th episode’s tight scripting, high gravitas levels, and “great hair day”.

Trudeau explained that this video gambit was in fact a variation on “an old teacher’s trick, to put on a video”. The former educator admitted he had considered substituting his daily address with some film containing nominal educational value (“Glory was always a solid choice”). But he was then reminded that they had banked several weeks worth of video addresses, and decided to re-air “one of the greatest hits”.

Eagle-eyed viewers may notice that parts of the video of Trudeau’s March 19th address have been spliced with brief clips from his March 25th address, “just for flow purposes”. PMO techs also added a brief clip at the end from Trudeau’s cameo appearance on Corner Gas Animated, “just as a fun easter egg”.

Across the nation, Canadians seem to have largely not noticed the Prime Minister’s trick. “I kinda got the sense something was off when the PM was dressed for March’s colder weather,” noted Gracie Sylva, of Thunder Bay. “Not to mention when his suit and tie switched from shot to shot. But otherwise it seemed fine.”

Other viewers, however, proved less picky. “I don’t care at all what the hell day his video is from,” explained Lawrence MacKenzie, of Sydney Mines. “I just wanna see Trudeau on TV saying vaguely comforting things, cuz I’ve seen the alternative from down in the States. No thank you!”

Back in the PMO, Trudeau mused that, should the coronavirus pandemic extend much longer, he “may have to consider airing a clips episode”. The Prime Minister’s staff was also hard at work coming up with new material for tomorrow’s broadcast, including celebrity interviews, possibly adding Andy Richter as a sidekick, and recasting the Prime Minister mid-season “like on Bewitched.”

In a related story, today Andrew Scheer also delivered a televised address that went unnoticed by Canadians.