news Archives - The Beaverton

Tag: news

CTV announces 24 nanosecond news cycle

TORONTO – Following the Lisa Laflamme “Hair-gate” scandal, CTV News has announced a groundbreaking programming initiative to revamp their flagging national reputation as a leading source of…

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Breaking: All the news happening all at once

EARTH – According to reports from every single human being’s television, social media and worried mothers, all the news is currently happening right now. “I took a 10 minute shower and when…

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