justin trudeau Archives - The Beaverton

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Breaking: All the news happening all at once

EARTH – According to reports from every single human being’s television, social media and worried mothers, all the news is currently happening right now. “I took a 10 minute shower and when…


Trudeau slides into African Union’s DMs

ADDIS ABABA – A flirtatious Justin Trudeau has slid into the DMs of the African Union’s Instagram account while on a charm offensive throughout the continent. “Heeeeey, you seem familiar, d…