OTTAWA – As cases skyrocket around the country and hospitals are overwhelmed, the federal and provincial health approach of ‘see no covid, hear no covid’ has been called into qu…
Tag: COVID
Study: 1 in every 25 people in PEI have Covid-19, and they are: Jim, Paula, Big Jim, and Tina’s boy Ricky
SUMMERSIDE – A Covid-19 wave has washed over Prince Edward Island, leaving one in twenty-five Islanders–or four individual people–currently Covid-positive. “For a long time, we were doing pretty …
Danielle Smith graciously admits that genocide might be as bad as antivaxxers not getting to go to the movies
EDMONTON – Danielle Smith made international headlines during her first day as premier of Alberta by claiming that the unvaccinated are the most discriminated-against group she’d ever seen,…
Alberta Tories excuse Danielle Smith’s ignorance of history by reminding us she is a product of the education system they built
EDMONTON – After Alberta’s Premier-designate, Danielle Smith, called unvaccinated people “the most discriminated group that I’ve ever witnessed,” members of her United Con…
Liberals drop COVID restrictions now that ‘keeping people alive’ no longer polls well
OTTAWA – The government has announced that, as of October 1st, the border vaccine rules, travel mask mandates and mandatory use of the ArriveCan app will no longer be in force, now that kee…
Weird! Everyone you know currently sick with the disease from that Pandemic that ended a while ago
Well this is odd! It seems that nearly every friend and family member in your life is currently testing positive for COVID-19, the disease from the 2020-2021 Pandemic. “I mean obviously bas…
Canadian government announces ten days of mourning for the 45000 Canadians who’ve died of COVID, jk, it’s for that one rich lady
OTTAWA – Canadians were shocked and gladened this week when the Canadian government finally acknowledged the immense amount of loss the country has suffered over the three years of the COVI…
Ontario to replace five-day Covid isolation period with pinky swear that you’re not still contagious
TORONTO – Ontario’s top doctor Dr. Kieran Moore stated in a press conference yesterday that, given the understanding that Covid cases will rise significantly in the fall with the cold weath…
Man who can’t afford to travel enters minute 25 of listening to friend’s airport horror story
TORONTO – Local man Eric Braiser is currently approaching the half-hour mark of politely listening to his friend Sarah talk about what a nightmare her recent flight out of Pearson was. R…
“Why are you still wearing a mask?” asks friend who’s had Covid 3 times
Oshawa, ON – Craig Batherson, your friend from intramural hockey who has gotten Covid nearly every time a new variant has developed, was surprised to see you wearing a mask. “You know…