The Beaverton

Man accidentally makes eye contact on subway

MONTREAL – During a routine commute, Montreal Metro patron Josh Ditton accidentally made eye contact with another commuter in an event the 32 year old office assistant described as “very aw…

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CEO calls it a day after long morning at work

CALGARY – Feeling the need to call it a day after a long morning of work, Global Oil Corp. CEO Marvin Bradley told his secretary to cancel his afternoon appointments. The tired CEO, who’s j…

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Google buys U.S. government

MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA – Google Inc. has purchased U.S. Govt, a service which creates and passes laws. “We’re thrilled to welcome the U.S. Government to Google,” a Google spoke…

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Study: Comedians make better lovers

MONTREAL – Comedians exhibit greater sensitivity and sexual stamina according to a new study published by McGill University. The study ranked sexual performance and partner satisfaction acc…

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