‘I won my office Oscars pool’ brags man with not much going on
SASKATOON – Reports indicate local man Jeremy Huang has spent most of the day bragging that he correctly guessed the winners of 20 out of 24 Oscars categories last night. Huang announced his vict…
SPCA discovers millions of starving Neopets in abandoned server farm
TORONTO – In a raid conducted yesterday, the Toronto SPCA made a horrifying discovery when they found countless neglected and starving Neopets in a de-activated server farm, apparently left…
Billy Crystal stages coup in attempt to take over hosting Oscars
HOLLYWOOD – Unwilling to accept a hostless ceremony, nine time Oscar host Billy Crystal has staged a coup to take control over the event. “How dare they!” screamed Crystal as he led a milit…
Five adorable Victorian fashion accessories to go with your child’s measles
The 19th century is back in vogue with a recent uptick in measles, mumps and irrational distrust of life saving medical procedures. But it’s not just healthcare that is going back 180 years, it’s…
WinRAR CEO horrified to learn his software has been free this whole time
SAN FRANCISCO – WinRAR developer Eugene Roshal was shocked to discover that despite his popular file compression program’s very clear 40-day trial policy, literally no one on the Internet h…
TTC finally admits “signal upgrades” just code for Fuck Party in the subway tunnels
TORONTO – Toronto Transit Commission representatives have shocked the city by revealing that the commonly used explanation for subway closures – signal upgrades – is simply code for all TTC emplo…
B.C. Parents furious after discovering son’s hidden vaccine stash
VICTORIA – Two B.C. parents advised today that they weren’t sure where they went wrong with their 12 year old son Henry after finding a stash of vaccines in his sock drawer. “We’ve told him…
Bombardier somehow misses deadline for train they weren’t contracted to make
MONTREAL – Following a long history of faulty products and broken contracts Quebec manufacturer Bombardier has missed a deadline for a train they were never contracted to make. “Our deepest…
Following copyright issue The People’s Party of Canada changes name to Maxime Overdrive
OTTAWA – After a B.C. man filed a court challenge claiming that he owns the rights to the name The People’s Party of Canada, the right wing political party founded by Maxime Bernier that ha…
