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Politics
Erin O’Toole ousted to make way for new CPC leader: this Fuck Trudeau flag
OTTAWA – Conservative Party leader Erin O’Toole has been removed in a caucus revolt, and will be replaced by a “Fuck Trudeau” flag that one of the MPs found outside Parliament Hill. The sec…
Green Party looking for couch to crash on
OTTAWA – With the Green Party potentially shuttering its head office as it struggles with insolvency, sources report that it will be looking for a couch to crash on until it can get back on its f…
New Conservative Party variant raises concerns
OTTAWA – A team of high level health officials are currently tracking a newly-discovered variant of the Conservative Party of Canada. The new variant was first detected among a caucus of Co…
Cabinet Shakeup: Meet the new ministers whose names you won’t encounter again until they screw up so badly it makes the news
OTTAWA – It’s a busy period for Canadians. Halloween is approaching, Christmas is less than two months away, and Canada is still in the grips of a deadly pandemic that’s crippling our econo…
Sean Chu thought City Council would be cool about sexual assault like former precinct
CALGARY- After announcing he would not be stepping down as Ward 4 Councilor amid protests over his 1997 sexual assault of a minor, Sean Chu said he is deeply disappointed that his current coworke…
Green Party stuck in a slow motion electric vehicle pile-up
SAANICH, BC – Dozens of bystanders watched in mild amusement as the Green Party leadership was trapped in a slow motion electric car pile-up. Highway 17 was at a standstill while Green poli…
Alberta demands ‘have-not’ provinces carry their share of its ICU patients
EDMONTON – As Alberta’s COVID hospitalisations hit a record high, Premier Jason Kenney has decried other provinces for not shouldering their fair share of the ICU load. “This is a ‘have’ provinc…
Liberals unveil $650 million “Spot the Difference” puzzle
OTTAWA — As the final results were tallied Monday night, the “new” Liberal minority government was proud to announce the culmination of thousands of hours of manpower and weeks-long campaigning: …
Election results: Everyone lost
OTTAWA – Early reports from Elections Canada indicate that all political parties have lost the election. With all polls reporting, Elections Canada has confirmed that no one got what they w…
