DALLAS, TX – Comedian and LGBTQ+ icon Ellen DeGeneres was seen with former President George W. Bush at a football game this past weekend. Following the backlash, DeGeneres responded by brav…
Culture
Top 5 Halloween costumes that are just the Joker you unimaginative white man
As the Halloween season approaches many people spend weeks looking for imaginative, unexpected costumes. Others do not. Beavefeed is here for all those white men who will watch Joaquin Phoenix’s …
“I’ll add it to the list!” promises man who has already forgotten what movie you’re talking about
VANCOUVER – John Sullivan, the man you are currently chatting with at a mutual friend’s party, has already completely forgotten the awesome movie you recommended he watch, despite the fact that h…
Queen announces ‘Keep Calm and Carry On’ so done
LONDON – The iconic British poster exhorting citizens to ‘Keep Calm and Carry On’ has reached its 2,000,000th recorded parodic variation, prompting Queen Elizabeth II to prohibit any more u…
Trendy sex store introduces ketogenic edible underwear
DIDSBURY, AB – A local sex shop is updating its inventory in an effort to meet the demands of modern lifestyle trends. Melanie Ortassia, manager of the popular adult store “Sex, Drugs, and …
HBO announces production of Chernobyl Christmas special
NEW YORK – Following the massive success of Chernobyl, the miniseries about the world’s worst nuclear disaster, HBO has announced a follow-up special airing this December which will bring a…
Local man determined not to cry at Come From Away
TORONTO – Local middle-aged electrician Albert Taves recently bought tickets to the popular musical Come From Away, and is confident he will make it through the entire performance without s…
Local man recounts incredible tale of discovering new podcast
HALIFAX – After surviving almost an entire week with nothing more than a three hour interview of Pete Holmes on The Joe Rogan Experience, humble office manager Dale Eckerd miraculously loca…
Free speech advocates upset Shane Gillis denied constitutional right to late night TV gig
NEW YORK CITY — Following an announcement that Saturday Night Live is officially cutting ties with Shane Gillis, self-proclaimed online defenders of the First Amendment insist that this is …
Friend promises TV show is really good once you get past the first three seasons
KITCHENER, ON – Local friend Nadia Ramirez insists her favourite TV show gets really good after you suffer through the first three seasons, and also most of season 5. Ramirez has reportedly not s…
