NORTH AMERICA – Despite being undiscovered since April, Canadian and Mexican officials are remaining firm in keeping the massive tunnel allowing travel between the two countries by going beneath the United States a classified project.
“The Sub-American highway is based on one of the major cornerstones of Canadian-Mexican relations; sidestepping around whatever problems the U.S is causing” Said Minister of Foreign affairs Francois-Phillipe Champagne. “Think of it as our version of the Channel Tunnel, only instead of going under water, it goes under a nation full of COVID and Nazis.”
“We’ve been making great progress and have almost gone completely undetected.” Said construction team leader Shawn Newman. “There was one point where we thought Colorado might have heard us, but we held still for a minute and they moved on. At this rate, we’ll be able to complete the extension to Argentina by 2030.”
At press time, an awkward situation unfolded when the construction crew encountered a team of Americans trying to tunnel from California to New York.