Canadians love fucking just as much as the next guy. Maybe more since it helps keep us warm in the winter. But turns out we like fucking in different ways depending on where we live. Here are the…
Tag: sex
Most popular Porn searches by Province
Turns out Canadians have some extremely specific tastes. Read this list to find out what people in every province are getting down to. Newfoundland: “Cum From 5 feet Away” Nova Scotia…
Blushing God approaches Sue Johanson with sex question no one else has been able to answer
HEAVEN – Hesitant and embarrassed, God, the almighty Lord, creator of Earth and the heavens, approached recently deceased sex educator Sue Johanson with a question. “Hey, I’m, a…
PPC struggle to adapt to Poilievre’s popularity with their base: men who keep a list of every woman that’s rejected them
OTTAWA – The People’s Party Of Canada are struggling to adapt to Pierre Poilievre’s ascension to Conservative Party leader given his popularity with the men who make up the part…
Report: Boyfriend wants to try something called “platypus style”
CALGARY – Local sources state that Martin Walsh is hoping to add some excitement to his relationship by convincing his girlfriend to do it platypus style. “We’ve been in a bit of a rut lately,” W…
Jack Black’s ‘Peaches’ triggers a generation’s sexual awakening
Orangeville, ON – An entire generation is reveling in its sexual awakening, thanks to Jack Black’s wet, hot hit, “Peaches” from the Super Mario Bros. Movie. In the film, Black plays Bowser, a Koo…
Breaking: Your grieving mother definitely slept with Gordon Lightfoot
Leamington, ON – Your mother has been sitting silently on her porch running her fingers through the fabric of an old summer dress and listening to “Gord’s Gold” on repeat all week and, oh God, oh…
McDonald’s releases Big Mac Sauce-flavoured lube
Brantford, ON – McDonald’s just announced the release of its new Big Mac sauce-flavoured personal lubricant. Following the success of the Chicken Big Mac and Big Mac sauce dip, the fast-food gian…
Study: Men who believe moon landing was faked less likely to believe orgasms can be faked
STANFORD, CA ― Belief in a massive, logistically impossible conspiracy theory wherein NASA has spent more time pretending they went to the moon than it took them to actually go there does not sug…
John Tory’s career inevitably cut short by his raw, unstoppable sexual magnetism
TORONTO – In the wake of Toronto Mayor John Tory’s shocking announcement that he will be stepping down after admitting he had an affair with a staffer earlier this year, residents across th…
