Sherbrooke, QC – Local teenager, Jeremy Powers, has grounded his parents for continuously leaving the house and not heeding Public Health’s warning to self isolate. “I’m at the end of my wi…
Tag: Parents
Couple give dignified human name to puppy, name baby something fucking weird
ABBOTSFORD, BC – Proud local couple Vincent and Christina Hull recently revealed on social media the name of their new puppy, Jessica, as well as the name of their newborn daughter, Champyo…
Parents trying to decipher alternative school’s crystal-based report cards
VANCOUVER – Sherri and Tucker Jackson love the support and individualized learning their daughter Braylyn receives at her alternative elementary school, but they were slightly confused when…
B.C. Parents furious after discovering son’s hidden vaccine stash
VICTORIA – Two B.C. parents advised today that they weren’t sure where they went wrong with their 12 year old son Henry after finding a stash of vaccines in his sock drawer. “We’ve told him…
Child hoping parents divorce in time for two Christmases
STONY PLAIN, AB – With only days left until Christmas, local 2nd grader Ryan Nepalen is hoping his parents will finally make the long overdue decision to separate in time for him to have tw…
Royals fuck
LONDON, UK – Following much speculation about the bedroom activities of royal family members Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, the couple’s Kensington Palace office recently confirmed that th…
Husky 12-year-old in dance recital winks seductively into audience of parents
SURREY, BC – According to sources in attendance at Simpkins Dance Academy’s annual all-ages showcase last Saturday, a 12-year-old dancer tossed her head irreverently to the side, and winked…
Parents told their baby ‘looks just like them’ mistakenly interpret that as a compliment
Stratford, ON – Local couple Malorie Lester and Richard Finkel are under the woefully inaccurate impressions that their friends and family were being positive when they told them their new …
5 Easter egg hiding places that demonstrate your tactical dominance over your children
Whether it’s lying about a bearded man breaking into the house every Christmas or repeatedly subjecting them to grisly reminders of their own mortality at Hallowe’en, the holidays are about one t…
Child gets Facebook account to keep tabs on parents
SAINT JOHN, NB – Making sure they’re not getting into any serious trouble, local 13-year-old, Francis Hollander has recently created a Facebook account to keep track of her parent’s activit…