KAMLOOPS, BC – After several alarming reports, we can now confirm that the Jacobs family house cat, Jojo, is not having any of it. “He won’t eat, he won’t respond to his name. He’s just kind of s…
Tag: cat
Baby determined to put entire housecat in mouth
VANCOUVER—Reports have confirmed that nine-month old Madison Karn wants more than anything in the world to fit her parents’ 10-year old Himalayan mix cat, Mittens, entirely into her mouth. Madiso…
Sweater mostly cat hair at this point
MONTAGUE, PEI – Sporting her favourite sweater for a weekend gathering, friends of local woman Theresa McCallum, 34, revealed today that the black turtleneck she was wearing was undeniably …
STUDY: Sunbeam through window proves cat dusty
OTTAWA – Vexing people with allergies, a series of afternoon sunbeams through a window have proven that a local cat emits a surprising number of dust particles after moving or scratching it…
Friendly neighbourhood cat just looking for good place to shit
KAMLOOPS, BC – Local domestic cat Mittens, known to many in his neighbourhood for spending his days prowling through backyards in apparent curiosity, is in fact curious only about which per…
Hero cat saves entire family from full night of sleep
NANAIMO, BC – The Russell family was saved from another full night of sleep when their cat, Mittens began meowing for no apparent reason at 4 in the morning. “We were all just peacefully laying i…
BREAKING: Local dog feeling great
KAMLOOPS — Late-breaking reports indicate local golden retriever, Max, is loving life and is just having the best day. “Woof! Woof!” shouted Max the dog to a crowd of fascinated onlookers a…
Hero cat saves couch by barfing on carpet
MISSISSAUGA – The Ryan family cat, Cupcake was awarded the household medal of bravery after saving their brand new sectional by vomiting on the carpet instead. “At first I thought it was a hairba…
Saskatchewan election coverage bumped by breaking news story on cat in tree
REGINA — Election results for the 2016 Saskatchewan election have been interrupted with a late-breaking story of a feline in a tree. CBC, CTV, Global and other news channels immediately cut…
Cat just keeps getting bigger
HAMILTON, ON – Despite health risks and the recommendations of veterinarians, local cat Cheesecake has continued to be fed, and continued to grow, at an alarming rate. “I understand h…