TORONTO — This week, Premier Doug Ford announced a bold plan to privatize birds in the province of Ontario. “We’ve been wasting money on public birds for too long,” said Ford. “We simply ca…
Tag: Andrea Horwath
Don’t all these nerdwads realize firing teachers is totally boss?
By: Doug Ford I just don’t get it! Thousands of students protesting at Queen’s Park and for what? Because I did them a favour and fired a bunch a’ dumb teachers who force them to go to school! Th…
Ford government solves Toronto housing crisis for everyone who is an MPP
TORONTO – In a surprise move sure to boost the party’s popularity among Torontonians, the Ontario Conservative government has completely solved Toronto’s housing crisis for ever…
Andrea Horwath looking forward to continuing to have no power
HAMILTON – After securing a new position as Leader of the Official Opposition, Ontario NDP leader Andrea Horwath says she’s looking forward to having no power still when the provincial government…
In last-ditch effort, NDP urges voters to strategically already live in rural ridings
TORONTO — With just hours before voters finish casting their ballots in the Ontario election, the NDP’s leadership has appealed to those seeking to prevent a PC win to make a strategi…
Lifelong New Democrat excited to vote NDP for first time
Peterborough, ON – Having been a die-hard NDP supporter since he was in undergrad, local man Jason Newman, 33, is looking forward to not strategically voting for the Liberals in order to be…
Leaked Ontario election poll shows Ontarians ranked dead last
TORONTO – A newly leaked poll from EKOS research shows that Ontarians are poised to be the losers in the upcoming provincial election. “The popular vote is deadlocked between the NDP and th…
Kathleen Wynne loses Kathleen Wynne endorsement
TORONTO — As the provincial election looms, Ontario Premier Kathleen Wynne announced that she is rescinding her endorsement of Liberal leader Kathleen Wynne. “This was a difficult decision,…
Kathleen Wynne counters Doug Ford’s ‘Buck a Beer’ initiative with Toonie Negronis
TORONTO – In response to Doug Ford’s latest promise that he will bring back buck-a-beer pricing in Ontario, Liberal leader Kathleen Wynne has announced her own initiative to win over the he…
Ontario Green Party leader Mike Schreiner unsure who to vote for
GUELPH, ON – With the campaign for the Premiership of Ontario now well underway, Ontario Green Party leader Mike Schreiner revealed that he is still undecided as to which party will earn h…