LONDON – Renowned graffiti artist Banksy stunned the world this week when it was revealed that Donald Trump has been an elaborate, multi-media, site specific performance installation by the elus...
Shirtless Stephen Harper photobombs Calgary couple’s wedding, 5 dead
CALGARY – Tragedy struck a Calgary wedding yesterday evening when five people were killed and a dozen injured after former prime minister Stephen Harper decided to make a candid, topless appeara...
Loser kids trying to cash in on Netflix’s Stranger Things
Meaford, ON – A group of four hopeless geeks have begun to be more outspoken and confident, a behaviour their parents and classmates attribute to the release of the Netflix program Stranger Thin...
Yukon bar lists twelve beers on menu that are unavailable
WHITEHORSE – A local Yukon restaurant is featuring a dozen beers on its menu that are not available to anyone who visits their establishment. Menus at the True North Tavern list a variety of smo...
Bro scientists confirm world ‘pretty gay’
WOODBRIDGE, ON – Highlighting humanity’s continued effect on the global environment, the World Institute for Bro Sciences has confirmed the long disputed theory that the world is, in fact, “pret...
REPORT: Robots still decades away from perfectly mimicking human cruelty
WALTHAM, MA – Researchers at Boston Dynamics say science is still decades away from producing robots that can approximate the cruelty and malice of their human creators. “Even with the prevalenc...
Trump accuses Clinton of being angry orange-skinned man with bad combover
HARRISBURG, PA – At a campaign rally this week Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump fired off against rival Hillary Clinton, accusing her of being, among other things, ‘a stubby-fi...
Reconciliation: Trudeau shares 30 seconds of intense eye contact with every First Nations person
OTTAWA – After nearly 150 years of colonialism and cultural genocide, Canada is mending fences by granting every First Nations person in the country 30 seconds of intimate eye-contact with Prime...
Glowing swamp monster emerges as medal favourite in Olympic aquatics
RIO DE JANEIRO – A swamp-being of untold horror that recently emerged from the depths of Rio’s polluted waterways has become an immediate medal favourite in all aquatic events at the Summer Olym...
Rio Olympics opening ceremony includes memorial to all athletes expected to die during Rio Olympics
RIO DE JANEIRO – In a somber moment during the opening ceremonies for the Rio de Janeiro Olympic Games, a memorial video played in tribute to all the athletes expected to die in the coming weeks. The ...
