Report: Protestor encampment at McGill still cleaner than student residences
MONTREAL – A recent examination of the Pro-Palestine protest encampment set up on the McGill University campus has found that the students involved are currently living in conditions that a…
Top athletes in training to bang the best at Paris Olympics
TORONTO – Canadian athletes are deep in the grind as they practice day and night for the chance to bone the hottest people at the Summer Olympics. “Covid put a cramp in everyone’s ability a…
Dallas’ low camera angle allows viewers chance to imagine what may be happening along nearside boards
DALLAS – Viewers watching the Edmonton Oilers defeat the Dallas Stars in double overtime were treated to a special vantage point last night: a low camera angle that makes it impossible to s…
Trudeau startled by UK news that long-standing, deeply-unpopular governments must eventually hold elections
OTTAWA – According to sources in 24 Sussex Drive, Justin Trudeau was taken aback after learning that Rishi Sunak, the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, has called a July election despite some…
Proposed names for Toronto’s new WNBA team
TORONTO – With the official announcement of Toronto gaining Canada’s first WNBA franchise, the city is buzzing about what the new expansion team will be called. The team won’t b…
Toronto women’s hockey team already choking at an elite level
TORONTO – In a collapse worthy of the Maple Leafs, Toronto’s PWHL team has been eliminated from the playoffs after blowing a commanding 2-0 series lead in their best-of-5 semifinal against Minnes…
Kris Knoblauch flips big switch in office from ‘split up McDavid and Draisaitl’ to ‘play McDavid and Draisaitl together’
EDMONTON – With the Oilers facing elimination in their series with the Vancouver Canucks, Oilers head coach Kris Knoblauch has taken the bold choice to flip the big red switch in his office…
Google announces plan to shove AI into all its products then eventually remove AI from all its products
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA – At its annual developer conference, Google has proudly unveiled the numerous AIs it will be forcing into its products until some point in the not-too-distant future when…
Olympic anti-sex beds to be donated to college dorms
PARIS – After much deliberation leading up to this year’s event, the International Olympics Committee has decided what to do with the Olympic Village’s infamous anti-sex beds – they will donate t…
BREAKING: Makers of 9-in-1 body wash admit it’s just laundry detergent
OTTAWA — In a stunning revelation that has shaken the personal care industry to its core, the makers of Düush+, a popular men’s 9-in-1 body wash, have admitted that the product is actually just l…
