TORONTO – With the imminent legalization of pot next week, Ontario’s provincial government has released new ads warning that illegal sales of pot could land them four years as a Premier. “T…
Ontario
Ontario’s financial plan revealed to be stack of lotto tickets
TORONTO – Concerns about the budgeting focus of Ontario’s PC government were brought to the forefront again this morning, when it was revealed that the province’s financial plan consists la…
Clean up continues after annual Ford Fest orgy
Vaughan, ON – Combing through the piles of empty drink cups and bottles of lube, efforts are still underway to clean up after this year’s annual Ford Fest fuck spree, with many attendees no…
Outdated sex-ed curriculum already has Ontario students pulling out
QUEEN’S PARK – This week the effects of Ontario’s outdated sex-ed curriculum were put on display when many students across the province began to pull out of class. “Everyone knows tha…
Doug Ford invokes War Measures Act to remove Toronto bike lanes
TORONTO – Following his controversial use of the Notwithstanding Clause to interfere with Toronto City Council, Doug Ford has enacted the War Measures Act to dismantle the Bloor bike lane in Toro…
Ontario News Now host blinks Morse code for help
TORONTO – While delivering her propaganda report to Ontarians to justify eliminating city councillor seats while lambasting the Ontario PC’s opponents, staffer Lyndsey Vanstone blinked out …
Doug Ford’s Midnight Society introduces only the most horrifying legislation
QUEEN’S PARK — To speed through passage of his controversial Bill 31 cutting Toronto city council in half, last night Doug Ford held a midnight session where members could pass their most “…
Doug Ford invokes notwithstanding clause to ram through legislation releasing all the snakes at the Zoo
TORONTO – Premier Doug Ford has invoked the notwithstanding clause, overriding a judicial ruling that said it was wrong to release thousands of snakes from the Toronto Zoo. “Folks, I was democrat…
Nation kind of surprised it took Doug Ford this long to eliminate Charter Rights
TORONTO – After Doug Ford’s bombshell announcement that he would use S. 33 of the Constitution to override the Superior Court striking down his decision to eliminate half of the Toronto Cit…
Farmer’s Knee’s Almanac predicts storm a-comin’, big one, too
ESSA — The Farmer’s Knee’s Almanac unveiled their prediction today that a big ol’ storm was liable to be coming into town. The long-running publication, edited by Gerald &…
