EDMONTON – After three years together, Joseph Webber and Nina Crawford celebrated their relationship with an unforgettable night out staring at their phones. The two began by reading up on Yelp f…
Local
BREAKING: Baby not done pooping
EDMONTON – Local couple, Doug and Sandra Tisdale, uncovered a horrifying development during a recent diaper change of their daughter Lana when they learned that Lana was shockingly still in the m…
Smugly telling grocery store cashier that he brought his own bags clearly making local man’s day
Sarnia, ON – Reports from inside a Sobey’s indicate that local man Gregory Sinclair is absolutely relishing the moment where he told the young lady ringing in his groceries that he didn’t n…
Weird cousin performs two hours of knife tricks at family gathering
BURNABY BC – Guests of Aunt Linda’s annual summer barbeque were dumbfounded last Saturday when fourteen year-old Riley Cresswell performed knife tricks at them for 2 hours. “He dropped it a…
Workplace round of Happy Birthday reveals no one sure of coworker’s name
CRANBROOK, B.C. – An otherwise ordinary round of Happy Birthday devolved into chaos at a crucial moment yesterday at the office of Cunningham & Partners, Ltd., exposing the office’s gen…
“He never tried to eat me,” friends defend cannibal
AJAX, ON — Friends of accused cannibal, Robert Black, are rushing to his defence after a tip to police revealed a freezer full of limbs in the basement of his house. “Look, I know Rob. He’s…
Son finds dad’s stash of old hardcore police chase videos
VANCOUVER – Yesterday evening, twelve year old Dylan Kitchener got more than he bargained for while rummaging through his parent’s closet. The impressionable youth stumbled upon a car…
Girlfriend’s relative thinks they can add you on Facebook just like that
HOME – In an act of what can only be described as massive presumption, Sheila de Souza, 53, a person that your girlfriend has confirmed is a member of her family, has sent you a friend requ…
“Possible hate crime” definitely actual hate crime
KINGSTON, ON — Police are investigating an incident outside a Walmart in Kingston that they have described as a “possible hate crime” despite it definitely being a real, actual hate crime. “It wa…
Labour Day parade’s precarious workers float cancelled last minute after being called into work
HAMILTON – The Precarious Worker’s float was pulled out of Hamilton’s Labour Day Parade an hour before festivities were to begin after all of the participants, including the flatbed truck t…
