OTTAWA – As spooky aficionados seek out creative ways to celebrate Halloween while practicing social distancing, an unlikely costume candidate has become popular: Jake Gyllenhaal’s characte…
Culture
Local woman’s fondest memory of 2020 is really gonna be that new Borat movie huh?
CALGARY – Despite her best efforts at self-improvement and professional development during the COVID-19 pandemic, it looks like, somehow, the peak of Florence Vega’s year will be her Monday…
Super Mario 3D All-Stars Review: Your family doesn’t love you, only Mario loves you
Super Mario 3D All-Stars: 4/5 stars – Lets-a-go back in time with the new Super Mario 3D All-Stars collection including Super Mario 64, Super Mario Sunshine, and Super Mario Galaxy which af…
Shredder refuses to denounce Foot Clan
NEW YORK CITY – After telling the Foot Clan to, “stand by”, prominent New York businessman and armoured, ninja guy, Shredder, is under heavy fire for his refusal to denounce the group. “I d…
Torontonians hope cold weather flattens curve of shitty outdoor stand-up comedians
TORONTO – The closure of comedy venues across the city this summer due to the coronavirus has caused an outbreak of Toronto’s shittiest and most offensive comedians to spread outside into public …
Schitt’s Creek Emmy sweep inspires Canadian government to add another nickel to arts funding jar
OTTAWA – After the beloved Canadian sitcom Schitt’s Creek walked away from yesterday’s Emmy Awards with 9 wins, the Canadian government was so buoyed by the show’s success that it decided to add …
Zack Snyder releases Justice League “Perfect Cut” which begins at end credits
HOLLYWOOD – Justice League fans are raving after Zack Snyder finally releases his perfect cut of the Justice League film which cuts everything except the end credits. “There was just so muc…
Report: All Samuel Beckett’s plays originally ended with the words “GET IT??????”
PARIS – Leading Beckett scholars have revealed that, before they were published or put on stage, every one of Samuel Beckett’s plays would conclude with Beckett writing “GET IT?????” in big…
Netflix adds Canada filter to American shows by removing scenes where characters wear shoes inside the house
TORONTO – Netflix Canada has announced a bold plan to make American movies and tv shows feel more familiar to Canadian audiences by editing out any scene where characters inexplicably wear …
Trailer for new Kevin James film confirms: Kevin fall down go boom
Trailers for Kevin James’ latest Netflix film “Bonk if You’re Horny” confirmed that this summer; big dumb toenail Kevin James fall down, much bang, head go boom. Directed by a shook up can of pil…
