OTTAWA – Yesterday the U.S. commemorated Juneteenth, the day widely regarded as marking the official end of slavery in the U.S., and today Canada is preparing to celebrate our 153rd straigh…
5 Father’s Day gifts that will almost make up for not going to law school
Father’s Day is almost here and, if you’re like me, you haven’t gotten your dad anything, let alone anything that will finally get him to forgive you for not going to law school! While nothing wi…
Jagmeet Singh kicked out of House for breaking parliamentary rules against telling the truth
OTTAWA – NDP Leader Jagmeet Singh was removed from the House of Commons yesterday for violating the rule against saying true things about structural racism and MPs roles in upholding it. “T…
After careful deliberation, local man ready to deliver opinion no one asked for on Black Lives Matter movement
Morden, MB – Local man Henry Gittner has finally answered the non-existent calls for him to provide his opinion on the Black Lives Matter movement and police brutality by writing a lengthy …
Maple Leaf Foods unveils new burger that’s 99% plant protein, 1% giant panda
Mississauga, ON – After successfully launching the 50/50 burger, a patty that is 50% animal protein and 50% plants, Maple Leaf Foods has unveiled their new creation: the 99, a burger that i…
Trudeau dangles suspected fraudster over balcony, demanding to know where his CERB money is
OTTAWA – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is currently dangling local waiter Oliver Henderson over an apartment balcony, demanding repayment of all CERB funds paid to him. “You knew you were i…
It’s not fair to judge all police officers based on the few bad apples we violently defend at all costs
By: Sgt. Larry Weathers, Minneapolis PD In the wake of the unfortunate passing of George Floyd, protests have started around the country demanding justice for Mr. Floyd, and accusing police offic…
Every living premier in Ontario blames long-term care facilities problems on their predecessor
TORONTO – In the wake of the Canadian Military’s truly disturbing report about conditions in Ontario’s long-term care facilities, every Premier and former Premier has found and blamed…
Air Canada CEO claims company is too busy firing employees to refund passengers
MONTREAL – Faced with mounting calls for the company to issue refunds to passengers whose travel was cancelled due to COVID-19 instead of just travel vouchers, Air Canada CEO Calin Rovinesc…
Man who has barely left basement apartment in months really enjoying his rich friends’ cottage photos
TORONTO – Local man Jerome Wittels has been housebound in his 300 sq. foot basement apartment since the COVID-19 pandemic lockdown began, but says he is getting quite a lot of enjoyment see…
