Editorial: This is my very bad, not thought out opinion and if you get even a little mad at me I’ll freak the fuck out - The Beaverton

Editorial: This is my very bad, not thought out opinion and if you get even a little mad at me I’ll freak the fuck out

By: Liza Garr

To all of you fortunate readers who have the honour of reading my words, welcome to the editorial section. This is a space where I feel comfortable to share my malformed and hastily strewn together opinion and if is met with even the slightest resistance, I will freak the fuck out.

Some might say it seems like I am publishing the very first thoughts that pop into my head with essentially no critical thought or even remedial fact checking. To these people I say guess what? I’m doubling down now, motherfucker.

You see, I am of the belief that ideas only have value when they are vomited out with zero vetting, and then forced onto others. What am I supposed to do? Have confidence in my opinions without the external validation of others? No thanks!

Look, it’s not easy having a mind like mine. It is actually quite burdensome to have such incredible thoughts. Can you imagine if every single time an event unfolded in the – regardless of whether it concerned you or not – you had to run to your laptop and type your kneejerk response out? It’s exhausting!

It’s not my fault that I am physically incapable of NOT weighing in. I’m rich, white, and have never experienced any hardship whatsoever. People need to hear my take on everything from , Race Relations, and Income Inequality. This privilege also means I am completely ill equipped to handle any criticism and as such, I will immediately interpret it as a personal attack on me and my family.

YOU’LL NOTICE HERE THAT I AM NOW WRITING IN ALL CAPS. THIS MEANS THAT I AM SCREAMING AND THE LOUDER I AM, THE MORE CORRECT I AM. THIS IS NOT UP FOR DEBATE AND SO HELP ME GOD IF I SEE EVEN ONE MEAN TWEET ABOUT HOW THIS EDITORIAL SUCKS, I WILL GO ON AND CRY ABOUT THE WOKE MOB. I WILL LITERALLY SOB.

IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?

To make matters worse, I now have to deal with the consequences of my words? It reeks of to me. Yes, this is a shit take that I just farted out and to be honest, I’m not even sure what I am saying anymore but why should that stop people from treating this editorial like it’s the God damned Gettysburg Address?

This whole thing has really made me want to start a podcast where I spend 2 hours and 26 minus talking about how I’m being silenced.