Airport security responded to a report that an elderly man parked his wheelchair illegally in one of the three Lexus spaces at Gate 4. After confirming the man did not own a Lexus, authorities immediately towed the manual self-propelled chair along with its owner, and issued a $300 fine to the confused retiree causing him to miss his flight.
“There are some people who are very inconsiderate towards the needs of luxury car owners,” explained a spokesperson from Calgary International. “These areas are clearly marked for people who own and drive these types of cars.”
The spokesperson defended their decision to accommodate travellers who are physically hampered by the weight of their wealth, which makes regular parking spots inaccessible to them and their $58,000 vehicles.
“We’re always exploring new ways to generate revenue at the expense of others. These new Lexus Boarding Spaces allow those who need it most – specifically Lexus owners – to drive through the terminal building and park their vehicles right at the boarding gate.”
The Airport Authority reiterated its apology for replacing accessible parking stalls for Lexus-only ones claiming that they have remedied the situation by giving more accessible parking spots to anyone who owns a BMW, Mercedes, Acura, Infiniti, Rolls-Royce, or Ferrari.