Yeah, yeah, I know. You’re all wondering where The Winds of Winter is. But you know what really winds my winters? The people who pay to adapt my works not taking my semicolons as gospel. So let’s…
Tag: Game of Thrones
Fantasy fans demand Rings of Power match House of the Dragon’s incest levels
HOLLYWOOD – Which team are you on — The Rings of Power, or House of the Dragon? For fantasy fans, there’s only one correct answer: whichever has more relatives doing each other. Dozens of o…
Game of Thrones prequel swears it’s changed, baby, won’t break your heart again
HOLLYWOOD — House of the Dragon, a new Game of Thrones prequel, has recently been spotted outside the windows of former fans of the epic fantasy series, holding a sign that said “I swear I’…
HBO ready to offer up another Game of Thrones prequel, you sick fucks
LOS ANGELES, CA – HBO reportedly has another Game of Thrones prequel series in development, which they are really hoping is what you fucking people want. Based on George R.R. Martin’s more …
Ancient Canadian curse requires that there must be an Anne of Green Gables remake every five years or else
AVONLEA – An ancient Canadian curse has been discovered on the original manuscript of Anne of Green Gables, demanding the book be adapted every five years, or else. The curse was first disc…
George RR Martin confesses he lost next Game of Thrones book down a storm drain
NEW JERSEY – Famed fantasy novelist George RR Martin appeared before bewildered reporters this past Tuesday to tearfully admit that he accidentally lost the recently-finished next instalment of h…
Fans angry Game of Thrones ended with all contenders saying “good game” and slapping hands
VANCOUVER – Fans around the world are furious about the Game of Thrones series finale, which consisted of nearly eighty uninterrupted minutes of the characters congratulating each other for…
Game of Thrones writers petition fans to write their own goddamn show, if they’re so smart
HOLLYWOOD – After a petition demanding that the writers of Game of Thrones rewrite the final season received over half a million signatures this week, David Benioff and D. B. Weiss fired back wit…
TV viewers wary of upcoming Game of Thrones/This is Us crossover episode
LOS ANGELES – While fans of HBO’s Game of Thrones are eagerly awaiting the upcoming premiere of the show’s eighth and final season, many are expressing concern with the decision to broadcast a la…
WinRAR CEO horrified to learn his software has been free this whole time
SAN FRANCISCO – WinRAR developer Eugene Roshal was shocked to discover that despite his popular file compression program’s very clear 40-day trial policy, literally no one on the Internet h…
