OTTAWA — As Ottawa enters its third week of occupation by Freedom Convoy protestors, Ottawa Police Chief Peter Sloly tendered his resignation today, citing a desire to spend more quality time wit…
Tag: Featured Post
Nation’s conspiracy theorists celebrate False Flag Day
OTTAWA – As Canadians spent the day commemorating the inauguration of the country’s iconic maple leaf flag, the nation’s weird shut-ins took to obscure subreddits for a celebration of…
Peaceful guns, democratic machetes seized from Alberta convoy protest
COUTTS, AB – Sources report that the RCMP have arrested 11 people at the Coutts border blockade who planned to peacefully participate in the democratic process with firearms, body armour and volu…
Top 2 things to do with your cat this Valentine’s day
Finding yourself alone yet again on Valentine’s day? With no one to share the special day with, except that cat you agreed to adopt when your roommate moved to Montreal? Not to worry, The Beavert…
Microwave vs Air Fryer: Which reheats sex toys better?
Listen, we all know the struggle. You’ve had a long day, and all you want is just to reheat something hot to fill you up inside for tonight. It used to be simple! Pop it in the microwave and acce…
Trudeau invokes Embarrassing Emergencies Act
OTTAWA – In light of the severe humiliation Canada is experiencing on the world stage due to the country’s inability to handle the anti-vaccine protesters, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is …
Police asked to help out at offices, retail stores while Ottawa residents do their job for them
OTTAWA – As local residents do their job of stopping angry convoy “protestors” from occupying the city, Ottawa police have been asked to at least pitch in and do some of these r…
Winter Olympians issued heated condoms
News in Photos…
Humiliating: Canadian women’s hockey team wins quarterfinals by a mere 11 goals
BEIJING – The Canadian women’s hockey team was embarrassed at the Winter Olympics after squeaking by Sweden in the quarterfinal with a meagre 11-0 victory. “Everyone in that locker room knows we…
Anti-vaccine convoys replace maple syrup as Canada’s number one export
OTTAWA – For the first time since Confederation, the top spot on the list of Canadian exports has shifted from the sweet syrup of the mighty maple tree to anti-vaccine, anti-government, pro…
