NEW YORK CITY – BuzzFeed is encouraging readers to design their dream Disney date to help them determine which of the 70 journalists, producers, editors, and other workers they just laid off they…
Tag: Featured Post
Local man scrambles to find last-minute gift for one year COVID anniversary
CALGARY – A local man who has somehow miraculously forgotten that he’s been locked inside for a year is scrambling to put together a gift for his one year COVID anniversary. “I just don’t know ho…
UK: don’t say bad things about our rich mummy
LONDON – The United Kingdom reacted with outrage to jokes about Queen Elizabeth II’s passing by demanding everyone stop saying bad things about their rich mummy. “Rich mummy was…
OPINION: In retrospect Julie Payette was the perfect representative for the Royal Family
By: Martin Day, Royal Observer Earlier this year, when it was revealed that Julie Payette was an abusive boss who treated people terribly, I was one of the loudest voices calling for her to resig…
Queen’s Commonwealth address stresses importance of family, friends, and not cooperating with the FBI in the ongoing Jeffrey Epstein investigation
WINDSOR – Queen Elizabeth II’s video message celebrating Commonwealth Day was a plea to all her subjects to focus on the people close to them in times of adversity and to never, ever give t…
Heartbreaking: this hot guy was only texting with you because he needs clean piss
Local woman Jessica Long fell under the spell of a hot young man, Ryan (last name unknown) in the summer, immediately taken with his every reply and Finger 11 song recommendations. Jessica quickl…
CN Rail installs speed bumps to curb speeding trains
MONTREAL – In a press release published today CN Rail announced plans to warp sections of train tracks into speed bumps to maintain Canada’s status as a leader in slow-speed rail transit. “…
Ontario scrambling after discovering vaccines need to be administered to population
TORONTO – The Ontario government is racing to fix a huge oversight with COVID-19 vaccines after realizing they also need to actually administer them to people. “I just don’t know how someon…
Governor brags that death tolls are bigger in Texas
AUSTIN – Texas Governor Greg Abbott brought an end to state-wide mask mandates and gathering restrictions late Tuesday evening, boasting that – like everything else – state coro…
How to continue feeling superior to Americans while watching them get the vaccine months before you
If there is one thing that has sustained Canadians through the tough times of the last year, as well as the tough times of literally every year before that, it’s our ardent belief that we a…
