Toronto girl opposes Osheaga headdress ban citing tradition of cultural appropriation

TORONTO — After the news that Aboriginal headdresses will not be allowed at Montreal music festival Osheaga, Toronto party girl Becky Cotter has been protesting the ban citing her family’s …

Iran and US agree to destroy world slowly via nuclear power instead

WASHINGTON – World powers and Iran struck a historic agreement Tuesday; Iran has agreed to curb its nuclear capabilities, putting the possibility of nuclear weapons out of reach, and drawing prai…

QUIZ: What Does Your Personal Information Say About You?

Sponsored quiz by: Authenic Quiz Corpp 1. What is your credit card number? A) 4530 1500 8503 0048 B) 4568 9304 1198 2283 C) 8492 9204 2748 2203 2. What’s your favourite password? A) My moth…

Justin Trudeau insists new beard completely unrelated to polls

VANCOUVER – Justin Trudeau arrived to a speaking engagement today with what witnesses say was a kempt, salt-and-pepper beard that gave him an air of maturity he had previously lacked in the…

Astronomical Union threatens planetary status of Neptune if funding demands not met

PARIS – In a surprise press conference this morning, International Astronomical Union President Norio Kaifu announced that, unless funding goals were met within the next 24 hours, the body would …

Occasion to drink, do drugs marred by presence of music lovers

ATLIN, BC – In what should have been a fun, substance-fueled weekend for a group of young people has been ruined by well-behaved music lovers attending a weekend festival. Local youths were…

PAN AM UPDATE: CANADA WINS GREEN IN WATER HOCKEY

TORONTO – After a breathtaking match against Suriname, the Canadian water hockey team has surged to victory, claiming Canada’s first green ribbon in the 2015 Pan Am Games. “We went out ther…

Saskatchewan man refuses to lower Confederate flag until someone explains what it means

Craven, Saskatchewan – After many were offended by the dozens of Confederate flags spotted at the Craven Country Jamboree, local man Erik Gibson has refused to remove his flag from his truc…

Starbucks to add coffee large enough for customers to climb inside, immerse selves, forget everything

SEATTLE – Starbucks has announced the addition of a new beverage size to the Starbucks menu, one that is large enough for customers to scale, climb inside, and forget everything happening i…

Visa offers Greece another credit card, increased spending limit

ATHENS – After opening his mail early this morning, Greek Prime Minister Alexis Tsipras was surprised to discover he and 11 million other citizens were approved for another credit card and …