PRINCE ALBERT, SK — In a story developing out of Dylan McDonald’s 10th Birthday party, fifth grader and charismatic leader Tyler Perkins has launched a campaign to watch porn at this slumbe…
Politics
“You think you got problems, buddy?” sobs Scheer drunk on milk to bar patron
OTTAWA – A sad scene unfolded at an Ottawa bar as Andrew Scheer succumbed to the anxiety of an uncertain future as Conservative Party Leader drinking far too many dairy beverages. “Oh, your…
Liberals deny newly created ministry is just political sloganism, says Minister of Getting ‘Er Done has clear mandate
OTTAWA – Despite the controversy surrounding its creation, the Liberals are adamant that a new ministry devoted to getting ‘er done is necessary and not a cynical and transparent attempt to…
Liberal appointed Minister of the Lower Class has to take bus to cabinet meetings
OTTAWA – In the wake of the Liberal government appointing the first Minister for Middle Class Prosperity, the lesser known Minister of the Lower Class will be required to commute to cabinet…
Trudeau announces new roster of future liabilities
OTTAWA – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has announced his new and larger cabinet, consisting of at least four ministers who are predicted to betray him by the next election. Since the SNC-Lavalin …
Scheer: If you wanted to know my real views on homosexuality, you should’ve made me Prime Minister
OTTAWA – After being asked by a reporter if he views homosexuality as a sin, Conservative leader Andrew Scheer made it clear that the only way Canadians are going to find out his true belie…
Elizabeth May on resignation: ‘I just want to eat meat again’
OTTAWA – Elizabeth May announced yesterday that she will be stepping down as Green Party leader effective immediately so she can finally sink her teeth into a rare t-bone steak. May, who ha…
Liberals promise to govern like Conservatives since they won more votes
OTTAWA – The Liberal government has vowed that, in the interests of fairness, they will be governing like the party who won the greatest proportion of the popular vote in the recent electio…
Misogynistic vandal promptly given job at Rebel Media
OTTAWA – The individual responsible for vandalizing Catherine McKenna’s office with a hate-filled message towards all women in politics has been offered employment by Rebel Media as a repor…
Update: Maxime Bernier too racist even for Quebec
BEAUCE, PQ – Early projections indicate that Maxime Bernier will lose his seat indicating that the former Conservative leadership contender too racist even for his native province. “Y…
