TORONTO – CBC Radio One has announced an upcoming true-crime podcast, already being hailed as the Canadian answer to the US podcast ‘Serial’, which will detail the circumstances surrounding…
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New $25 skinny cable package to revolutionize way viewers switch to Netflix
TORONTO – Canadian broadcasters unveiled their ‘skinny’, Canadian-centric cable packages today, a move that the CRTC says will forever alter the way Canadians cancel their subscriptions. “T…
Ontario to give low-income students free University education starting year after you graduate
TORONTO — The Ontario government announced this week a new program that will offer free tuition to all low-income students, and make post secondary education more affordable for middle inco…
Trudeau hints next Governor General may be giant Canada Goose
OTTAWA – In what is being hailed as a victory for diversity, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has dropped several hints in the last week that the nation’s next head of state may well be a huma…
Federal Court gives medical marijuana patients right to grow pot even though Evan has the good shit
VANCOUVER – The Federal Court of Canada handed down a landmark decision today that grants patients prescribed marijuana the right to grow their own plants despite Evan already having pretty…
Tories blast Liberal budget for not having imaginary surplus
OTTAWA — Interim Conservative Leader Rona Ambrose is blasting the governing Liberals for a reckless budget that proposes no theoretical federal surplus. “Running an acknowledged deficit onc…
Study finds 70% of nation just spares
BURNABY, B.C. – A nationwide study at Simon Fraser University has revealed that 70% of all Canadians are just spares in case some of the other 30% stop working or aren’t available. “Let’s s…
Canadian Forces’ BattleMech procurement program $500 trillion over budget
OTTAWA – The auditor general has released a report finding that the cost of replacing the Canadian Forces’ aging Leopard tanks with 70 tonne, galactic Summoner OmniMechs has ballooned to $5…
Guy who shouts things at bus station granted Alberta legislature press pass
EDMONTON — “Ted the Truthmaker”, an Edmonton resident who enjoys yelling conspiracy theories about the government at commuters, was granted a press pass to the Alberta legislature yesterday…
Study: Exposure to billboard ads linked to unrealistic expectation that all women are 70ft tall
SASKATOON – A new study out of the University of Saskatchewan shows that men exposed to billboard advertisements slowly begin to assume that all women are blonde, thin, and gigantic. “In re…
