TORONTO – Companies outraged that employees would choose to take the $2,000.00 Emergency Response Benefit over returning to work 40-50 hours per week in the midst of a pandemic briefly cons…
Business
Airline will no longer refund ticket holders whose lovers run to the airport last minute, with a change of heart, asking them not to get on flight
PEARSON AIRPORT – Air Canada has announced they will no longer honour refunds from ticket holders whose lovers propose to them at the airport last minute and then plead for them to not get on the…
Airlines to start flying with the windows down to prevent spread of Covid
TORONTO – Several major airlines announced today that they would start flying their planes with the windows rolled down to help prevent the spread of the coronavirus. The earlier decision b…
Execs beg Tim Hortons CEO not to release Black Lives Matter specialty donut
TORONTO – Executives at Canada’s most beloved/least edible fast food chain Tim Hortons have been begging company CEO Daniel Schwartz not to release the planned specialty donut “honouring” t…
Disney’s Splash Mountain loses coveted title of 4th most racist mountain in America
Orlando, FL – Disney’s Splash Mountain has lost its official designation of the 4th most racist mountain in America after the company unveiled plans to re-theme the attraction this week. “F…
Air Canada promises 100 bonus Aeroplan Miles to any passenger that gets COVID
MONTREAL – In the wake of announcing that the company would abandon social distancing efforts on its flights, Air Canada is attempting to reassure nervous passengers that if they do contrac…
Finally a mask for men! This one has a lil dump truck on it
LINDSAY, ON – As many men across the globe have been forced to reckon with the overwhelmingly feminine nature of medical masks, one company, Macho Masks, has capitalized on this concern by …
Dixie Cups quietly changes name to Cups
DALLAS, TEXAS – In response to the recent wave of civil rights protests against police brutality and white supremacy erupting throughout North America, iconic paper product company Dixie Cu…
Progressive! Crayola finally acknowledges the white crayon is useless
NEW YORK, NY- In wake of the worldwide outcry for increased equality, handicraft company Crayola has released a long-awaited statement admitting that white crayons have no real function and shoul…
Trump Hotels to change name after revelation founder had history of racism
NEW YORK CITY – Trump Hotels, a luxury line of hotel accommodations across the United States, has announced that they will be immediately rebranding after stunning revelations that the chain is n…
