OTTAWA – From atop his gilded throne, ensconced in the the resplendent halls of Parliament Hill, Prime Minister Harper today sought his third prorogation since assuming office, before nonch…
Tag: Stephen Harper
Trudeau fetus polling well in focus groups
OTTAWA – Justin Trudeau’s expected third child has polled well among voters according to Nanos Research. Since conception, the Trudeau fetus has been polling well in focus groups especially…
War of 1812 celebrations extended to 2017
Canadians everywhere are bracing their wrists for even more flag-waving as the government announced it will be prolonging the War of 1812 celebrations until 2017.histhist Minister of Heritage She…
Canada only finds Arctic interesting, attractive when someone else wants it
In light of the American and Russian advances towards the Arctic, Canada has suddenly realized how much the Arctic means to it. With thinning of sea ice, the leaner and sexier version of the Cana…
Harper responds to Trudeau’s marijuana use by admitting he once didn’t use bike helmet since becoming PM
OTTAWA – After Justin Trudeau admitted to smoking pot while he was an MP, Prime Minister Stephen Harper confessed today that he once failed to take proper safety measures while riding his b…
Harper prorogues parliament to catch up on Breaking Bad, Mad Men
WHITEHORSE – Prime Minister Harper announced today that he will be proroguing Parliament until October so he can get up to speed with his favorite AMC television shows. “This has been a grueling …
Harper hopes shuffle will improve cabinet sex life
OTTAWA – Attempting to spice things up in Ottawa, Prime Minister Stephen Harper unveiled a wide-ranging overhaul of his executive government on Monday, a move the P.M. is quite hopeful will…
Harper on Alberta floods: ‘Don’t worry, the oil is okay’
CALGARY – Prime Minister Stephen Harper reassured Canadians yesterday that Alberta’s most important natural resource, oil, had escaped significant damage from the flash floods that ha…
Harper denies knowing Duffy, Conservative caucus, his children
OTTAWA – After a series of embarrassing mishaps and scandals Prime Minister Stephen Harper is denying any role in knowing Senator Mike Duffy, most of the conservative caucus and members of his im…
Economic Action Plan to build houses for senators where they claim to live
OTTAWA – In response to the recent Senate housing allowance scandal, the Harper government announced a new program that will construct residencies for senators pretending to live in the pro…
