Barrie, ON – Local septuagenarian Elise Reede is reportedly trying to avoid drawing attention to her forged ID that says she’s 80 years old while she waits to receive a COVID vaccination. “…
Tag: Featured Post
Seagull quits cigarette butts in favour of discarded Juul pods
VANCOUVER – Mirroring the popular shift from smoking to vaping amongst human smokers, a nicotine-addicted seagull has switched from eating cigarette butts to eating discarded Juul pods. “Th…
Hockey Night In Canada names Piers Morgan new host of Coach’s Corner
TORONTO – Hockey Night in Canada announced today that they were bringing back their long-running Coach’s Corner first-intermission segment with Ron MacLean and new ‘Coach’ Piers Morgan. “Pi…
Quiz: Was seeing Jean Chretien choke a guy your sexual awakening or are you normal?
While most young people experience sexual awakenings as a result of cute movie stars, attractive musicians, or even neighbourhood hotties, a population of Canadians were lucky enough to have Jean…
BuzzFeed posts “Which Of The Journalists We Just Laid Off Are You?” quiz
NEW YORK CITY – BuzzFeed is encouraging readers to design their dream Disney date to help them determine which of the 70 journalists, producers, editors, and other workers they just laid off they…
Local man scrambles to find last-minute gift for one year COVID anniversary
CALGARY – A local man who has somehow miraculously forgotten that he’s been locked inside for a year is scrambling to put together a gift for his one year COVID anniversary. “I just don’t know ho…
UK: don’t say bad things about our rich mummy
LONDON – The United Kingdom reacted with outrage to jokes about Queen Elizabeth II’s passing by demanding everyone stop saying bad things about their rich mummy. “Rich mummy was…
OPINION: In retrospect Julie Payette was the perfect representative for the Royal Family
By: Martin Day, Royal Observer Earlier this year, when it was revealed that Julie Payette was an abusive boss who treated people terribly, I was one of the loudest voices calling for her to resig…
Queen’s Commonwealth address stresses importance of family, friends, and not cooperating with the FBI in the ongoing Jeffrey Epstein investigation
WINDSOR – Queen Elizabeth II’s video message celebrating Commonwealth Day was a plea to all her subjects to focus on the people close to them in times of adversity and to never, ever give t…
Heartbreaking: this hot guy was only texting with you because he needs clean piss
Local woman Jessica Long fell under the spell of a hot young man, Ryan (last name unknown) in the summer, immediately taken with his every reply and Finger 11 song recommendations. Jessica quickl…
