MANHATTAN — Oral hygiene giant Colgate-Palmolive has announced a new line of sensitivity-increasing toothpastes designed to cater to the needs of fucked-up little pain goblins everywhere. Colgate…
Tag: dentist
Dentist fooled by patient who brushed teeth really well just before annual visit
WATERLOO, ONT – Local dentist, Dr. Rita Johnson, was reportedly fooled into thinking her patient had excellent oral hygiene even though they only brushed their teeth really well moments bef…
Man currently paying out of pocket for dentist, therapist and medication grateful to live in country with Universal Healthcare
Kingston, ON – Local man Brandon Struthers, who currently spends thousands of dollars a year on healthcare, feels so lucky to live in a country where the government provides for everyone…
Local woman dies from blood loss after flossing for first time in 4 years
CALGARY – Mabel Doyle, a 24 year old graphic designer bled out in her apartment last Wednesday after attempting to floss for the first time in four years. “I’m the one who found her”, said …
Optimistic woman only burns June pages of 2020 planner
TORONTO – As provincial governments are taking slow and measured steps towards loosening social distancing regulations, 26 year-old Montana Tremeshko destroyed only the June pages of her 20…
Ontario Dentists relieved they won’t have to work on poor people teeth for at least another 4 years
TORONTO – With the Ontario PC Party in power, Dentists across Ontario are breathing a sigh of relief that they won’t have to work on an additional 4.5 million poor people’s teeth. “Dental c…
Community not sure about dentist who works from home
Kingston, ON – Community members are searching for a new dentist, now that Dr. Teske has started seeing patients exclusively in his at-home clinic. “Dr. Teske’s a good dentist, …
New and improved Google calendar now automatically reschedules your dentist appointment eight times
Mountain View, CA – Tech giant Google has unveiled a highly anticipated update to their calendar app, letting it automatically reschedule your dentist appointments so you don’t have to. “Wh…