OTTAWA — Prime Minister Justin Trudeau enthusiastically marked one year in office with a tasteful and sentimental Instagram collage. “What better way to celebrate the Liberal party’s landsl…
National
Trudeau: Only 39.5% of people voted for electoral reform
OTTAWA — Prime Minister Justin Trudeau’s Liberal government is backing away from a promise on electoral reform by claiming they didn’t get enough votes in the past federal election to refor…
Canadian Association of Clowns say scary clowns no laughing matter
Haliburton, ON – The association representing the nation’s 50,000 clowns has condemned recent incidents of scary clowns in a fun-filled and mesmerizing press conference earlier today. Tumbl…
Canadians thankful for harvest or St. Lawrence voyage or something
OTTAWA – Canadians nationwide are gathering with friends and family to give thanks for the harvest or a historical St. Lawrence voyage or whatever. “My family always has a big turkey dinner…
Alberta’s NDP government to outlaw pickup trucks, steak in 2017
EDMONTON – Alberta Premier Rachel Notley announced today that her government has enacted new legislation to ban the use of pickup trucks within the province effective January 1, 2017, with …
Polls suggest Canadians want minorities to assimilate to culture they can’t define
CANADA – New polls suggest that 68% of Canadians want minorities to assimilate to Canadian culture while simultaneously having no idea what that really means. “Canada is a cultural mosaic,”…
Mississauga-born MP caught lying about being born in Toronto
TORONTO – A Globe and Mail investigation into an MP’s actual birthplace has revealed that Science Minister Kirsty Duncan was, in fact, born in neighbouring Mississauga rather than the City …
Trudeau approves Pacific NorthWest LNG Pipeline, citing future job growth in disaster relief sector
Richmond, BC – The federal government has approved the $36 Billion Pacific NorthWest Liquefied Natural Gas project; an investment which is expected to eventually produce thousands of disast…
Environment Canada requests additional funding to replace obsolete wildlife
OTTAWA – Following a disappointing lack of innovation in both the flora and fauna sectors, Environment Minister Catherine McKenna has requested additional federal funds to improve Canada…
Royals visit charity to raise awareness about Royals
Kelowna, BC – The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge took time out of their busy schedule to visit a homeless shelter to raise awareness about the Royal Family among the country’s most vulnerabl…
