OTTAWA – Sources report that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has sunk into a bout of profound melancholy due to the conflux of COVID, Afghanistan, China, and unpredictable Conservative support, voc…
National
Jean Chrétien hired as Trudeau’s bodyguard
OTTAWA — In response to violent protesters swarming his personal appearences, Liberal leader Justin Trudeau has hired Jean Chrétien as his personal bodyguard. The 89-year-old has several decades …
Erin O’Toole reverses position he hasn’t announced yet
OTTAWA – In the wake of changing his position on abortion, guns and the carbon tax, Erin O’Toole has also announced that he no longer plans to sell corporate naming rights to all of …
Antivaxxer spends day protesting hospital where he’ll spend next month intubated
TORONTO – Local anti-vaccine protestor Brayden Crosby, 32, spent today demonstrating against COVID-19 vaccine mandates outside the hospital where he will coincidentally be admitted for chro…
Trudeau nervous about losing job, suddenly extends CRB
OTTAWA – In response to recent forecasts that he may not have a job for much longer, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has announced a sudden extension to CRB. “The Canada Recovery Benefit was introd…
O’Toole: “If there is one policy area where it’s ok to be ambiguous, it’s which guns will be illegal”
OTTAWA – After spending a week flip flopping over whether he would repeal the Liberal government’s assault weapons ban, Conservative leader Erin O’Toole is now saying that Canad…
Anti-vax protestors throw rocks at Trudeau due to not having entered Bronze Age yet
LONDON, ON – During an election campaign stop Prime Minister Justin Trudeau faced anti-vaccine protestors who hurled rocks, namely because they lack the intelligence and evolutionary capabi…
Highlights of the Liberals’ election platform
The Liberal Party released their election platform this week. Unfortunately no part of the 82-page document explained why they didn’t just do all of this instead of calling an election. But…
Liberals announce election platform of things they could have easily done before now
OTTAWA – Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and the Liberal Party have unveiled their 2021 election platform, full of commitments and spending promises they could have easily fulfilled at any ti…
Erin O’Toole speaks out against the violent anti-vaxxers whose support he is actively courting
OTTAWA – As aggressive right-wing, anti-vax protestors continue to scream obscenities and shout at staff during Trudeau rallies, Conservative leader Erin O’Toole has called their beha…
