CALGARY – Calgary transit driver Jesse Rau has said that, if assigned to drive one of Calgary Transit’s rainbow Pride flag buses, he will only drive 100% straight on his route. “Being a Christian…
Local
Zombie Walk takes tragic detour through Chainsaw Expo
SEATTLE – Attendees at this summer’s Seattle Zombie Walk met a gruesome and wholly predictable end after taking a detour through the nearby 2015 Husqvarna Chainsaw Expo. The annual Zombie W…
Local man tidies small corner of apartment for Skype call with parents
HALIFAX – Local veterinary technician Brian Chambers, 27, has reportedly cleaned a small fraction of his one bedroom apartment in advance of a Skype call with his parents, in hopes of creat…
Firefighters save town after repeating ‘white rabbit’ to change wind direction
KEREMOS, BC — A small town in the BC interior has been saved from the flames of a forest fire after dozens of firefighters changed the smoke’s direction by repeatedly saying ‘white rabbit’ …
Stephen Harper offers cursing supporter Senate appointment
TORONTO – During a campaign stop reporters asking questions about the Duffy scandal were cursed at by a Harper supporter, before he was removed and offered a seat in the Senate. “I spoke to…
Eighteen-year-old finally mature enough to vote against self-interest
KINGSTON — Having reached the age of eighteen, local man Blake Thompson is reportedly thrilled to at last be old enough to vote in a way that will decrease opportunities and benefits for him now …
Midlife crisis averted by motorcycle accident
Although divorced and in his late forties, local man James Baucher has managed to avoid a midlife crisis by becoming involved in a severe motorcycle accident. “He was really hasty and desperate t…
Shy man so close to getting his comment in
Red Deer, Alberta – Notoriously shy Red Deer College student Gavin Desautels came incredibly close to getting an anecdote in about Radiohead during a conversation at a friend’s house party.…
Cat just keeps getting bigger
HAMILTON, ON – Despite health risks and the recommendations of veterinarians, local cat Cheesecake has continued to be fed, and continued to grow, at an alarming rate. “I understand h…
Mom replaces dead husband while kids away at camp
ESSEX, ON – Following the unexpected death of her husband Greg, mother of two Shelly Polluck has managed to find a replacement with similar markings just days before her children return fro…
