HOLLYWOOD – An Oscar nomination can bring with it tremendous accolades, career opportunities and, for nominees of the short film categories, a huge uptick in their viewership, potentially …
Entertainment
Oscar Prediction: Dunes from DUNE favoured to win Best Dunes
HOLLYWOOD – With the 94th annual Academy Awards airing this Sunday, cinema fans everywhere have feverishly taken to discussing their predictions. From Best Picture to Best Score, many categ…
Oscars add “Best Spider-Based Picture”
HOLLYWOOD – In a last-minute move to boost ratings, The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has added a new category, ‘Best Spider-Based Picture,’ awarded to ‘the best film featurin…
Local parents concerned Elden Ring some kind of sex toy
TORONTO, ON — Reports indicate many Canadian parents believe Elden Ring is some form of sex toy, as FromSoftware’s newest video game hits 12 million copies sold in 18 days. Many parents were deep…
Man who “can’t relate” to Turning Red loves Star Wars
TORONTO – Local man Terrance Matthews has reported to his friends that he couldn’t relate to Turning Red’s main character while still deeply relating to Luke Skywalker from Star Wars. “The…
Friend insists you gotta watch first 17 seasons of TV show before it gets good
NETFLIX, Internet – Your friend just scolded you for giving up the show he wanted you to watch after you reported only watching the first three seasons and not liking it. “Dude, you didn’t …
Batman has been out for a week, isn’t it time for a reboot?
Los Angeles, CA – After a very long week in theatres, there’s only one question on people’s minds, who is going to play Batman next? With the public’s ravenous appetite for reboots and reva…
New Pixar movie details fantastical story of being able to afford living in Toronto
TORONTO – Pixar Studios’ latest animated adventure, Turning Red, details the whimsical and outlandish story of a family who are able to afford a house in the downtown Toronto core. Turning …
Award-winning death metal band turns out to be dishwasher full of old nails
STOCKHOLM – Fans of the Swedish death metal band Malfunctioning Whirlpool were shocked to discover that the hit musical group is actually nothing more than recordings of an old dishwasher r…
Opinion: I didn’t get it at first but once you start fucking Pete Davidson it totally makes sense
LOS ANGELES – By 2025, the World Health Organization predicts 80 percent of the world’s population will have contracted COVID-19, and 91 percent will have fucked Pete Davidson. I fucked Pe…
