VICTORIA, B.C. – CPC leader Pierre Poilievre has expressed keen interest as news broke that BC Conservative Party leader John Rustad is unilaterally rejecting his party’s attempts to remove…
Man who gets winded climbing stairs describes plan to repel home invasion
GEORGE, NB – Despite no self-defense training and being incredibly out of shape, cell phone kiosk employee Wade Creamer, 27, has often described to friends his plans for countering a potent…
Danielle Smith invokes notwithstanding clause to ban Canada’s Drag Race
EDMONTON – Following the invocation of the Notwithstanding Clause to shield the Alberta government from legal challenges arising from bills targeting the province’s 2SLGTBQIA+ community, Pr…
Demonic dog baring teeth and growling just happy to see you, says owner
ARNPRIOR, ON – Local residents expressing concern over the behaviour of an aggressive dog were reassured by its owner that he is actually quite friendly and loves people. Residents walking …
Alexa explodes after Canadian replies to query with, “Oh, yeah, no, for sure.”
OROMOCTO, NB – A local man almost lost his home yesterday after his Amazon Alexa smart home device burst into flames. Lloyd Wentworth, 38, says the fire started as he was preparing dinner i…
French authorities won’t charge Louvre thieves on grounds the crime was really cool
PARIS – Following a brazen daylight heist of the French crown jewels from the Louvre, French authorities have declared no charges will be laid, citing the country’s “Trop Cool Pour Être Un …
New Tron movie looks pretty co – aw, shit is Jared Leto in this?
Saint John, New Brunswick – Initial excitement over the latest entry in Disney’s sci-fi Tron franchise was ruined when it was discovered it also stars Jared Leto. During a recent family mov…
Second Amendment activists in shock as Charlie Kirk shot instead of just schoolchildren
OREM, UT – Americans who champion the right to bear arms were shocked Wednesday as controversial commentator Charlie Kirk was shot and killed, as opposed to the ordinarily acceptable trend …
“They didn’t have autism in my day,” claims man with thorough knowledge of the history of the Caledonian Railway
Fredericton, New Brunswick – Despite decades of research, a Fredericton man says that autism didn’t exist in his day and that he would like to show us a replica map he created of the 1920 C…
Air Canada, union reach deal, forcing travelers to fly Air Canada again
MONTREAL – As stranded passengers celebrated the news that a tentative deal had been reached by Air Canada and the union representing flight attendants, the mood was tempered by the realiza…
