EDMONTON – According to sources in the Premier’s household, Danielle Smith has invoked the notwithstanding clause to make her husband take out the trash.
“As a libertarian-minded politician and spouse, I believe it’s important to limit the use of such a heavy-handed constitutional tool for the issues that really matter, like when a transgender teenager wants to play junior high basketball or I don’t feel like putting my shoes on again after getting real cozy,” Smith told reporters. “Everyone in my province and my household should have the right to do what I think they should do.”
Smith’s husband, David Moretta, will now need to take out the garbage for the next five years, after which he can consider whether to elect a new spouse.
“The chore sheet said it was Danielle’s turn, but before we could discuss the issue she just said that invoking the clause will really be protecting me from other chores,” noted Moretta. “I’m glad she’s looking out for me in a way that also happens to be advantageous to her.”
Analysts have warned that Smith’s casual use of the notwithstanding clause could encourage other premiers to follow suit.
“The notwithstanding clause is generally reserved for serious disagreements between the provinces and the courts, or whenever Quebec feels like being more xenophobic,” said Murray Verner, a political scientist at the University of Alberta. “Premier Smith invoking it to win an argument could encourage David Eby to dominate the question of what shows to stream in his home, or Doug Ford to force his kids to buy him better Christmas gifts.”
Smith, however, insists that she will only use the notwithstanding clause whenever it was absolutely necessary to enforce a crucial law, temporarily satisfy her insatiable hardline voter base for another day, annoy Mark Carney, or make the life of another member of her province or household harder for no good reason.
“I was brought into this marriage to lead,” Smith said, “and sometimes leadership means skipping past the facts to enforce my will with a sledgehammer.”
At press time, Danielle Smith was telling her husband that she did not feel like standing up to get a snack, if he caught her drift.
