KINGSTON – Hundreds of thousands of university and college students are returning to campuses across the province, and among them are hundreds of thousands of Buck-a-Beer cognoscenti looking for only the highest quality of beers.
Groups of connoisseurs gathered in living rooms, streets, and rooftops to critique mass produced lagers, ales, and whatever else was only a buck thanks in large part to Premier Ford’s initiative.
“PC Genuine Lager is best served three degrees celcius in a funnel,” said Queen’s University third year student Gavin Blake to a group of colleagues examining the bottle in the light. “And of course, it must be appreciated within 10 seconds or less.”
Engineering student Leah Parkdale chimed in as she took a long swig of the refined beer:
“The label is a bit guache, but I can really feel it on the nose and in my sense of balance. It was aged for 4 weeks and I can really smell the beer smell. There are so many nuances to getting hammered with this one.”
However, some critics were not entirely satisfied with their carefully selected choices.
“This PC de-alcoholized beer really misses the mark for me,” scorned a sober political studies student George Ocampo scribbling remarks in his beer tasting book. “This makes a mockery of brewmasters everywhere.”
The only reported faux pas of the afternoon and evening occurred when a group of concurrent education students were accused of being pretentious for bringing a 2-4 of Bud Lite.