National Energy Board insists texting ‘we cool?’ counts as consulting First Nations - The Beaverton
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National Energy Board insists texting ‘we cool?’ counts as consulting First Nations

CALGARY – On Thursday, the Federal Court of Appeals quashed the proposed pipeline expansion project, citing as part of their supporting evidence a mass text sent from the to various groups that read, “we cool?”

“I was just about to fall asleep, when I got a text at like midnight from the NEB asking if we were ‘cool,’” said Tsleil-Waututh Chief Rueben George. “We haven’t spoken in months but they always creep their way back when it’s convenient for them.”

The National Energy Board maintains that the late night text was delivered sober and not as a thinly veiled last ditch effort to save their relationship with Indigenous people. A spokesperson from the NEB claims that had anyone responded to their messages, they would have fulfilled their constitutional duty to “engage in a considered, meaningful two-way dialogue.”

“We would have totally sent a follow-up eggplant emoji or fire symbol at least.”

According to Indigenous leaders, the NEB then followed up a few weeks later with message saying, “Didn’t hear back from you, so we just went ahead with it! Hope that’s cool! :)”

Following the decision by the Federal Court of Appeals, the NEB has agreed to carrying out a proper consultation in the future. Said a spokesperson, “We promise to leave a lengthy, comprehensive and thorough message on their voicemail.”

with files from Alex Huntley and Emma Overton

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