DALLAS, TX – There is nothing mysterious or supernatural about the Bermuda Triangle, reports Bill Ketterle, a US pilot who perished there in a plane crash in 1957.
“Look, I know there are many rumours about what goes on down there,” said Ketterle, whose decaying remains washed up on the northern shore of Puerto Rico six decades ago, and who was definitely burned down to the bones in a Dallas crematory shortly thereafter. “But they are just that – rumours. There just ain’t a shred of scientific evidence suggesting anything uncanny.”
“And if there is, I ain’t seen it!” added Ketterle with a wink that knocked girls off their feet when he attended college in the late 30s.
Ketterle, approaching 100 but looking no older than on the day his airplane disappeared off the radar while flying through the Bermuda Triangle, was spotted walking along the Melbourne, Florida coast last week in a pristine military uniform that was discontinued right after the Vietnam War.
Sources overheard Ketterle promising passersby that “there’s nothing to fear” after offering them a flight on the same Lockheed U-2 whose left wing and fuselage were found by two Cuban fishermen sometime in the 70s.
At press time, Area 51 was still just an ordinary military base, reported a guard at the facility who was then immediately black-bagged and thrown in a van.