PALO ALTO – In only the latest privacy scandal to rock Silicon Valley, new leaks reveal that the LeapPad learning tablet has been selling information about your child’s favourite shapes to right wing think tanks.
“I became suspicious when my daughter started receiving targeted political ads for the colour yellow,” said local mother Jessica Trent. “But I really knew something was up when Emily started talking about Cwooked Hiwwawy’s involvement in Benghazi.”
LeapPad has confirmed the details of the leak, but has yet to say whether Cambridge Analytica also had access to personal information, such as your child’s favourite dinosaur, and how much of the alphabet they know.
“Privacy matters,” said one representative of the ACLU. “Just because we all use social media to tell people that Velociraptor is the best, doesn’t mean those platforms have the right to sell that information to people who want us voting for T-Rex.”
While LeapPad CEO Martin Zuckerman has yet to issue a public statement, he did appear before congress today, where he failed to answer basic questions about his platform, such as what sound a cow makes.
“We need to hold tech firms criminally responsible for public breaches like this,” said Maisey Davis, a local 13-month-old. “Personal data is personal property; it’s time we told big tech that the sale of that property is not a business model. It’s theft.”
“On a side note, could you please change my diaper now.”
But all is not lost for LeapPad. While progressives have rushed to dump stock, sales to the far-right have surged, ever since President Trump ordered hundreds of the brightly-coloured tablets as a replacement for the White House’s computers.