Woods, Forest – The annual gathering of Teddy Bears for a picnic and all around gay time, has been met with controversy this year, due to Teddy Bear gun rights activists wanting to bring their assault rifles to the picnic.
The most vocal of these Teddy Bears has been Cuddle B. Wuddles.
“We’re just trying to protect ourselves and every other Teddy Bear from enemies who might try to catch us unawares. I mean, for ev’ry bear that ever was, will gather for certain so we just want it to be safe.”
“Yeah!” Agreed fellow Teddy Bear Fatty Tum Tum. “Our enemies better go out in a disguise, cuz if I catch them, alone or not, they’ll be in for a big surprise. My gun! A Winchester Model 12 Heavy Duck in a 3 inch Mag with a real dirty Super X buckshot.”
Wuddles went on to say their guns won’t affect any of the wonderful games to be played as long as “ev’ry” little bear has a lovely time today.
Not surprisingly some bears have spoken against such actions.
“How are we supposed to gaily gad about with guns up our button noses?” Said Penny Wenny Cotton Bottom. “What happens when we’re playing hide n’ seek and one of these bears get’s scared and shoots out my gumball eye? You think little Susie is going to take me back? She’s got an ipad my days are numbered as is.”
Gun rights has become a major topic because of last years events, when the annual three legged race almost turned into a one legged race after teddy bear Beary Potter’s M1911A1 accidentally went off.
“I didn’t mean for it to go off,” said Beary Potter, “I just thought I saw one of those people in disguise, that those anchor bears on Like a Fox News we’re talking about. So if you want to take away my gun you’ll have to take it from my soft felt paws.”
At press time everyone was taken home to bed, because they were tired little Teddy Bears.
