VATICAN CITY – Pope Francis has described people’s decisions to have pets instead of children as “selfish”, during a recent general audience in the opulent cathedral-like palace of which he…
Tag: Catholic
Local Satanist worried his church is only second most evil
BARRIE, ON – After reading about the latest controversy surrounding the Catholic church, devout Satanist Damien Winslow is conflicted on whether or not his faith is doing enough of the devi…
Catholic church one broken commandment away from bingo
OTTAWA, ONT – The Catholic church is reportedly one broken commandment away from getting a full card bingo. “It’s a real nail-biter,” began Father Owen Karmichael, after flashing his almost…
5 ways to suggest an open marriage that all end in divorce
Though you may not have signed up for an open marriage when you said “I do,” that doesn’t mean you and your spouse can’t rewrite the rules mid-game! Here are five subtle ways to casually bring up…
Toronto Catholic schools to reopen so kids will be with God sooner
TORONTO – The Toronto Catholic School Board has announced that schools will reopen with regular class sizes in the hopes that students will get sick and join God sooner. “The government isn…