TORONTO – Local man Mark Williamson has found the courage within himself to admit that, despite his previous claims, William Nylander is actually one of the best players on the Maple Leafs.…
How to protest mass slaughter without inconveniencing anyone
As Israel continues to bombard Gaza, causing the deaths of thousands of civilians, you may be wondering how to properly protest without causing a huge scene or bothering people just trying to enj…
Media promise to start covering Pierre Poilievre’s transphobic comments as soon as they finish 50th story on how Liberals are unpopular
OTTAWA – In the wake of Pierre Poilievre condemning “radical gender ideology” at an event in Richmond Hill, Canadian newspapers, radio shows and evening news broadcasters swear …
Liberals explain why they’re so far behind in the polls
The federal liberals continue to flounder, with poll after poll finding that, if an election were held today, Pierre Poilievre and the Conservatives would secure a massive majority government. We…
Right-wing, authoritarian broadcaster known for polarizing comments to meet with Tucker Carlson
CALGARY – Criticism is brewing over the baffling choice to invite a right-wing demagogue and prominent anti-vaxxer to meet with Tucker Carlson. “I’m all for free speech,” said Alberta nativ…
You fucking Leafs fans still think I’m the worst Defenceman you’ve ever seen?
By Justin Holl Well well well, look how quickly that shit fucking changed didn’t it you platinum seat suit wearing fucks? For the past 3 years all I’ve heard from you Wendel Clark lov…
Everything Israel is doing to minimize civilian casualties in Gaza
As Israel continues its bombing campaign in Gaza in an effort to destroy Hamas, they are taking a number of steps to minimize civilian casualties. Here they are: 1. Tell the media they are doing …
Canada calls for 5 minute water break in Israel bombing campaign
OTTAWA – Continuing our country’s long standing role as a global leader in humanitarian causes, the government of Canada has stepped forward and announced its support for a 5 minute w…
Most popular Halloween Costumes in each Province
It’s that spooky time of the year again, when kids and adults with drinking problems spend an inordinate amount of time planning out costumes that they will either look back on fondly or tr…
Charter Of Rights & Freedoms renamed Charter Of Long-Term Goals & General Guidelines
OTTAWA – With Conservative Premiers now freely using S. 33 to overrule any court ruling getting in the way of their agenda the federal government has announced plans to rename The Charter O…