CLEARWATER, FL – Hulk Hogan, who helped lead professional wrestling’s rise in popularity in the 1980s and beyond, was pronounced dead on Thursday after first responders were unable to resuscitate him by landing an elbow drop on the wrestler’s heart.
“When we got the medical call and determined the patient was undergoing cardiac arrest, we immediately rushed him to the OR. OR, of course, meaning Operation Ring,” says EMT Greg Foley, three-time winner of the Swolest EMT Championship. “We went all the way to the top rope to try and revive him, and kept going until the coroner rang the bell, but we couldn’t generate a great enough impact.”
“We kept waiting for him to get back up, but then we remembered that only Undertaker can come back from the dead. It looks like this hospital has seen its last recorded case of Hulkamania.”
Born Terry Bollea, Hogan began wrestling in the mid-1970s. His popularity soared in 1984 after he defeated the Iron Sheik to win the heavyweight championship of what was then called the World Wrestling Federation. He would go on to have a storied career in the world of wrestling before making a real-life heel turn and endorsing Donald Trump in 2024.
Sometimes referred to as the Savage Manuver, dropping an elbow onto a patient’s heart in order to shock it into a regular biorhythm is not advised for most heart attack victims, as only the most buff hulkamaniacs are likely to survive it. It is one of several life-saving techniques reserved for use on wrestlers, along with the Suplex of Life, The Detox Headlock, and CPRNC (Cardiopulmonary Rear Naked Chokeholding).
Hogan’s remains are expected to be piledrivered to rest at Andre the Giant Memorial Graveyard in North Carolina.
In other wrestling news, medical experts are still baffled by the fact that a man who used to go by Brutus Beefcake is still alive.
