Ever read about a historical figure and think, gee, what did they actually look like? Well, scientists have gotten to work on creating accurate reconstructions of what some historical figures looked like and it turns out they all look like noted character actor, Steve Buscemi! So go ahead and meet your heroes!
Attila the Hun
Attila the Hun, was the feared ruler of much of Eastern and Central Europe. But in real life, anthropologists have recently discovered, he had a gentle and retiring appearance, with a soft chin and kindly blue eyes, not unlike the famous Boardwalk Empire star.
John Wilkes Booth
Abraham Lincoln’s killer John Wilkes Booth goes down in history as one of history’s most notorious criminals. However, a recent reconstruction of his appearance shows that he shares an appearance with some of cinema history’s most beloved criminals, from Mr. Pink in Reservoir Dogs to hapless kidnapper Carl in Fargo. Pretty neat, huh?
Anne Boleyn, the second wife of Harry Tudor, was famed for her dark eyes, oval face, supple frame and coy manner—but scientists have confirmed that she in fact looked 100% like Steve Buscemi! WE KNOW, RIGHT?
Fun fact, scientists say Boleyn looked less like young Steve Buscemi and more like present-day Steve Buscemi. (They specifically told us to think less Barton Fink and more Death of Stalin.)
Numerous historical photos show the 33rd US President Harry Truman him with a prominent nose, large glasses and graying blond hair. However, a scientific reconstruction of Truman, who died in 1972, has shown him to have the trademark brown hair, rakish features and pale skin of our pal, Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation star Steve Buscemi. LIKE WHAT TESTS ARE THESE SCIENTISTS EVEN USING?
Sure, wasn’t he a famous Asian warrior who lived nearly a thousand years ago, and isn’t it extremely odd that he would look just like Italian-American actor/volunteer firefighter Steve Buscemi? The answer is YES! OF COURSE IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE! DO YOU THINK WE MAKE THE RULES? Do you think we want this? Listen they tell us somebody looked like Steve Buscemi, THAT’S WHAT WE PRINT. Who is behind this? Why? We don’t care anymore. We can’t. And honestly, we don’t want to know.
Peter the Great
Okay that one’s actually plausible I guess.