ISSAQUAH, WA – Wholesale retailer Costco has unveiled the screaming child as the mascot for all of its stores.
After extensive research, a child having a catastrophic meltdown without cause is what most people commonly associate with whenever they walk into their stores.
“When people hear one or more wails, screams, or whines from a tiny person, they think of Costco,” said Costco’s Executive Junior Vice President C.J. Barton. “Their loud complaints can be heard echoing through our massive stores as their parents try desperately to calm them or do nothing at all.”
The screaming child mascots will be displayed throughout stores across North America, especially on weekends.
“Truly, it is our company’s in-store music that you can’t turn off,” added Barton.