Dozens die in cannabis legalization joke overdoses - The Beaverton

Dozens die in cannabis legalization joke overdoses

OTTAWA – Dozens of Canadians are reportedly dead and thousands of others have been hospitalized after consuming a deadly amount of cannabis-related jokes immediately after pot became legal.

Emergency room doctors and nurses were overwhelmed by patients who heard too many low-hanging fruit tweets about already forgetting if pot was legalized to ‘high’ school wisecracks on Facebook.

Doctors say consuming too many memes and shitposts about the country having the munchies, children being born on this day named ‘Mary Jane’ and images of cloud covered cities can lead to permanent eye-rolling, even death.

“We have a code orange situation,” said Ottawa General Hospital physician Dr. Lawrence Tam in a crowded emergency room. “Though we should call it code green. Am I right?”

The doctor then paused looking at the dying patients to see if anyone was cracking a smile.

“But seriously, I haven’t seen so many joke overdoses since the Clinton-Lewinsky affair and that situation brought some people to their knees, if you know what I mean?”

The doctor’s second one-liner was met with further silence.

At press time, you don’t need to point out the irony that this is also a joke about since we’ve already done so, thank-you-very-much.