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Boss wondering politely if Jewish holidays over yet

CALGARY – Recent developments out of Calgary have suggested that your boss has once again begun the polite but sincere vocal inquiries as to whether the Jewish holidays are finally done and you will be at work a little more often these days.

“Hey Sandra, we sure did miss you last week and the week before,” your boss began in what has become an annual routine. “So are the holidays all done now or……. like are you gonna be gone again soon?”

“There are just so many I can’t always keep track” he continued.

Your boss immediately followed the question with several caveats and qualifiers to make sure you understood that your workplace was by no means suggesting that you shouldn’t keep your religious observances. He continued to explain that Kyle was definitely able to handle your extra workload while you were gone and that Kyle was the one truly wondering how long that would be for and so they just needed to figure it out “for scheduling purposes”.

“I don’t know why he doesn’t remember from the past eight years,” you reported, “but every year it’s the same question with the same tone that suggests that he is worried about a human rights complaint if he pushes too hard.”

Jewish people celebrate four major holidays between September and October annually but you have definitely told him that like three times already. Indeed, sources close to you confirm that you only really take off and and are fine to work on Succot and the one after which even you sometimes forget about.

In fact, identification of the holidays remains a borderline ritualistic challenge for your boss with him identifying various holidays throughout the year as “The dinner with the crackers, Jewish Halloween, and ‘the sad one, no the other sad one’. Each attempt often concludes with a hastily added, semi-audible “so beautiful though… really, really.” At this time, you remain confused as to why someone seeking to be respectful of his employees’ observances could not conduct a simple google search to get the names right.

“I’m just going to take a full week vacation around rather than explain to him again that it’s not a major holiday,” you advised.

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